The music of my thoughts

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It's already all over work. DX CNN and LA Times didn't even list the story yet; they still featured that other actress that died.

*mixed feelings*

*starts throwing temper tantrums*

cosplay progress...
;__; My gingers have a dull spot in them - how do I get them sharpened? I know once in a while Joann's has a free scissor sharpening, but I have no idea when the next time that'll be. ;.; It makes me so sad to cut with them, they are superior scissors, but I can't make one solid cut.

Chroniko's making good progress!! I don't think I will have trouble finishing her in time for AX :D her hat came out shockingly well. There's still some things that need work and adjusting but somehow I figured out the main parts alright o.O ... and when I put everything together, it looked pretty cute, despite the fact my Chroniko diet is only going so-so.

My goal is to get new make-up before AX :D ... I wish I'd gotten it sooner though so I have time to learn how to put it on. ^_^; I'm an amateur when it comes to make up. I don't even really know what to buy. .__.

Rene...ugh... I want to redo half of it... but I don't think I have time... and I just don't know how to do the front nicely, so I stopped working on him for now. .__. I need to start practice wearing contacts too >.<; I never went to the optomitrist to have my eyes measured. ;__; Eventually ....

So, so far, my cosplay plans for AX:
- Marianne from Code Geass: gathering on Sat, at 11 am in the West Hall Lobby
- Nadeshiko from Shugo Chara :D with

lucathia_rykatu and

whitelilacs and others...?!
- Chroniko from Kaiba with

tenshiyaki,

wabisuke,

gintaku,

admyr_777?
- Rene from Neo Angelique with

whitelilacs and

epiic (assuming I finish to my satisfaction)
- Hana-chan from Fruits Baskets if I finish it (I suspect I have a chance, only cause Chroniko went so well) with

wabisuke: gathering is on Sat, at 3 pm at the side entrance by Petree Hall
- Chaos Head... maybe... not >.>; I don't have any fabric, and I'll be lucky to finish Furuba so...

DX *GASP* No tenipuri on the list... ;.; Nande! But when New Prince of Tennis uniforms come out >D kekeke ...

For those of you going to Japan~
Yay, citibank reimbursed me the $61 it owed me because they accidentally charged me that stupid 3% transaction fee even though I only used citibank atms in Japan.

This is sort of advice/a warning: A lot of banks now are charging a 3% 'foreign transaction fee', every time you use your credit card or debit card in a foreign county (including Japan DX). Now, citibank has lots of locations so I opened an account there and only used citibank atms to get money - no atm fees, you know? But the charges all came up as 'noncitibank atm' and they charged me 3%. I had to walk into the bank today (even though I e-mailed them about it a month ago) to get refunded.

But I still think the system works pretty well - you just have to let your banker know ahead of time you're going to Japan, and also, after making your first withdrawal, check your account online. If you're getting charged, e-mail them right away so they stop the charges, and also save all of your withdrawal receipts. I had luckily saved two (out of four or five) and I think that helped the banker believe me since I was able to show him exactly when I'd used them, and that it was really a citibank atm despite how it was listed.

/end story ^^;

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥
Happy Birthday

rasuberi!!

Your gift is... going to be... considerably late. ^^; (I don't know what's going on with TokyoPop, for some reason they haven't sent TWK vol 3 to any actual stores or something along those lines. DX;; ...) But worry not!! It'll all come eventually. :D; ... Eh ..hehehe...

^^ AX Hotel Room! We have space for another girl at the Holiday Inn. It'll be between $150~$160 for Days 0 to 4. Anyone interested? :3 You won't be able to have your name on the registered list but it doesn't matter since we don't use the shuttle service.

Err... I'd like to say I made some progress this weekend but I really didn't. .__. I haven't a clue how I'm gonna finish things, considering the last two weekends were pretty much fail for this and that weekend. I'm wishing very much I was like you college peeps, and had some solid one-week time to work on stuff. Instead I keep going out with friends because well... it's just lonely to spend the whole day working on cosplay by myself. Or maybe because I can't resist a friend's invitation to go out (after all, I'm a fairly lonely person nowadays, so I can't say no to an invitation for company).

I finished Kannagi; the karaoke episode was the best, it was funny. Picked up Gintama again... I'm on episode 31.... where's the rumored plot?! :O Still...no plot... I think there's a 'little' more plot but not really... ^^; Should I keep watching? I may start Maria Holic next. I read the Kuroshitsuji manga and caught up on Tsubasa Chronicals ♥ and xxxholic =;.;= and am now catching up on One Piece, and plan to read Skip Beat next. :3 And I read volume 18 of Furuba. (But believe it or not, this has nothing to do with why I can't get cosplay done. Since I'm working on cosplay while watching these things... it's going out with people, people coming over, going home to HB, excercising for Chroniko, and stuff like that that's eating up my time... oh yeah and WORK because I work full time.)

........ I'll just go crawl into a hole now. .__.

Nvm... I'm just having a bad couple of weeks in general... starting with Fanime, where I was sick and miserable the half the time, then there's this really disappointing issue with one of our projects at work, then my mess up on Saturday, and then just a lot of little things piling up...

I need a break. From everything. .__.

really pointless post ... in honor of the late hour
Cosplay party tomorrow with

konishii and co :D and on Sunday, meet up with

wabisuke...?

Now for more random and useless things... (i.e. anime ^^;)

- Caught up on Hetalia. LOL at America omg I love the stereotypes... the whole diet episode was like, 'yah exactly!' Cause like... when I went to Japan, I was shocked. D: Their proportions are fairly big, they have pasteries and bakeries and sweets galore... how the h*ll do they stay skinny?!

- Watched a little more Junjou Romantica. :D The second couple really is better, Hiro ♥ so I shall keep watching XD

- Still trying to figure out Silver Chaos... I may have to wait till c.c. is over and can show me directly. ^__^;

- Catching up on Tsubasa! KYAAAN! =~.~=

But I think my chroniko diet's pretty much failing. .__.

Wow, well, Japan recap is on hold until...probably after Fanime. ^^;

I spent all of last week being jetlagged and terribly miserable. All of a sudden on Sunday I drank coffee and perked up. It's probably a good thing I didn't post... it would have been very emo and winy and full of my miserable misery.

I still have a ways to go on Rene for Fanime ;__; but I'm still going to try to finish... try at least. I have most of the parts, but the pleating is a total nightmare, I haven't even started the complicated lining part yet (and I have no idea if what I'm planning to do is going to work), and I realized I never finished coming up with a clasp part for his waist band thing. But I'm still going to try. ^__^;

I'm also planning on wearing Nadeshiko for Shugo Chara, but I should really test out the outfit before hand ^^; I made some changes since PMX and they might not be for the better. *sigh*

I still have no food. No wait... I have even less food than I had before, because I ran out of milk and my eggs are expired. .__.

There's plenty of other small stressors but I decided not to think about them. I'm just gonna do my best to get as much as I can done for Rene. .__. ...

Japan Day 1!! :D
Saa! Mou sugu hajimarimasu!

=^.^= Okay okay, so my trip was REALLY REALLY REALLY wonderful ♥ even the lonely and confused parts. ^__^;

I'm still in the process of editing pictures: I'm up to like... 141 already, and still in Kyoto (which means 4 days into my 16 day trip >.>;). But...anyway, let's start at the beginning! :D

( 11 pictures under the cut: Arrival in Japan! )

That's all for now! ^^; Next post will be on the actual sight-seeing. :D Kyoto ♥

TADAIMA OTSUKARESAMADESHITA
.... *collapse*

It was awesome. Good experiences, bad experiences, AMAZING experiences, things I really wanted to do, things that I'm so glad I did, things that shocked me and I'm SO GLAD I did, things that I wanted to get but didn't and now deeply regret, and many plans for next trip...

wabisuke: I have your wigs! The one for Tohru and Sato. I still have to sit around and figure out costs + conversion.

whitelilacs: You already know but I have your wig too. XD Cyperous was awesome<3

tenshiyaki: Amazingly I was able to get a Kanda plushie XD .... I ... hope you like it... >.>; (dot dot dot ... you'll understand when you see it ....)

miao_ji: Believe it or not, I discovered a store with one floor that was all sentai!! .... but..well...magiranger is old... I DID buy you something but...errr... well I'm giving it to you anyways. XD And I'll show you a picture of the more ridiculous thing I didn't buy you.
Alicia: I know you don't read lj, but I did go kit kat hunting the last few days! I wish I didn't wait till the end though, cause it turns out every combini has different ones and the special ones are hidden and hard to find. I did get one particularly interesting one though, that's super Japanese. XD

tsuneharamama: I should have bought more seeds when I found them in the ONE store that I found Japanese plant seeds at... but I did buy one, hopefully one you don't have, and one other thing at a 7-eleven (they have lots of 7-eleven in Japan)... hope you like. I also got the men’s handkerchiefs, three of them, I’ll tell you the stories behind them this weekend.

lorenzosama: yes I bought you a pouch, one that I personally think is very nice... but it’s in the mail. ^^; But I think it should arrive by the next time I’m home in HB. I also bought more tea snacks, hopefully they aren’t smashed and we can try them :D
.... I think that was everyone who asked for omiage...

And

rasuberi: ♥ if shipping is really expensive let me know. Don’t worry about the CLAMP art book... I’ll be over it by the time either of us find a copy. ^^; And it’ll just sit on my shelf doing nothing ... if I could somehow resist those gorgeously kira kira Aiba Hiroki fan magazine inserts... I can live without the artbook... but I want the Rainbow Bridge. >.< Lookie here!! Is there a way for me to order them?! ...can’t...read....site...

SO MANY F*ING PICTURES!!! I took pictures of (almost) all the food I ate. (Why almost? well it’s because...)

Most expensive purchase was not a cosplay uniform or a yukata...

But a new camera.

OTL

Ore-tachi wa - maji daze!
I love how yellow is a guy and pink is a girl. Kyoudai ai!

SHINKENGER 8 MAKES ME SOOO HAPPY! What I kept hoping would happen the whole episode (but I thought it'd be wistful thinking) HAPPENED!!! XD Gyagyagyagyagya~ <3 I am so dying for the next episode. =;__;=

... Err... I should say something that's not sentai related....

I ordered the dstt. And err... um... I got my locket for Chroniko. And... well... made very little progress on Rene. I like, cut a few strips of fabric. ... And .. err... yeah. .__. Still fairly busy at work. .... Friday = focus day.

..... I just wanted to post today for Aiba ♥ =~.~= Ryuu-san ♥ ♥ ♥

D: .... I can't tell the difference between katakana shi and katakana tsu. I mean, wth?! So what if the stroke order's different, it looks exactly the same when I pencil it out o.O .... all I can think is to slant the lines a little more for shi. ;__;

:D I got a hello kitty holder for my ds XD; it matches the red, and is very stylish if you ask me.

way_to_the_dawn lent me FF 3 and Zelda Four Swords :D thank you!! I still want to borrow FF 4, FF 6, Pokemon Firered & Leafgreen, the first three Phoenix Wright games, and Dragonquest from someone.

We finished Tales of Vesperia!! Well not completely, we didn't get to do the warehouses (hopefully it didn't get cut off ^^;), but we did beat the final boss, first on normal, then we went back to the save file and beat him on hard with the fell arms, which really didn't make much difference but three non-ai players (with two of those being super veterans) = strong!! And my Rita's gotten up to 8 fireballs (my count at the end of the night was like, 3008 or something, I shot off 200 during the two rounds of final boss fight XD). We still have special hidden dungeon, and to rebuild the new town.

.... We would have done all that but since it took us till 2 a.m. ... ^^;; yeah.... we decided to skip warehouses and just see the end of the story. Duke is pretty <3 Flynn x Yuuri (or Yuuri x Flynn??), other good pairings <3 ... >.>; I really like all the characters, even the girls, and the voice acting was very impressive, very good American dub. (The only good game dub I've played other than Kingdom Hearts.)

Jinsei banzai!

... but cosplay is so in trouble. OTL

DS lite get-o! It's USC colored but oh well, they're my buddies too now.

New ipod battery = fail. o.O I'm going to spending like 1.5k in prep for the trip before I even get there. Well that's including the airfair... hm... yeah that sounds about right, actually I think it's higher. ^__^; Maaaan most expensive trip ever. But I get to keep some things, like the ds lite and if I get a new ipod and some other things. Well... you see, my ipod warranty IS good, and I CAN get a new battery... but it'll be 2-3 weeks. T__T Argh, I'm such an idiot for taking so long. The problem was I took forever to make sure I had all the songs that are on my ipod in an itunes playlist. I was way too meticulous about it. *sigh* Such an idiot... I'll have to send my ipod in right away to make sure I still have my warranty, it expires in on June 7... even if I get a new ipod, as I think I want to for a possible relational tagging feature I've heard may exist, then I'd still want to make the most of my warranty.

Though I think between my ds lite, ipod, and ipod shuffle, I should have plenty of electronics to keep me entertained through the flight. I just have to remember to charge things at each hostel.

Things left to do: tell my bosses about the half-days I'll be taking on Monday and Thursday before my trip. Borrow lots of ds games from people. :D Does anyone have Final Fantasy 6 (Gameboy Advance I know) that I can borrow pretty please? *puppy dog eyes* And Pheonix Wright, and FF3 and FF4, and Dragon Quest, and any other good ds lite playable rpgs they aren't using? *bats eyelashes*

I have two more weekends to prepare, plus the day before I'm handling some things and I purposely want to pull an all-nighter so that I'll sleep on the plane.

Oh yeah... and I want to find a $1 copy of Twilight so that I can throw it away after reading it. XD; ... I guess I really will be buying all the important stuff (like toiletries >.>; after I'm already there ^^;; ....) *fail*

Does anyone have a Citi bank account?

I just opened a new one and if I say so-and-so referred me, then we both get moneys, yay! ... So anyone want a moneys? :D

I think it was actually yamaneko who gave me the advice but she's not answering her phone T.T answer yamaneko answer!

I opened an account so I could withdraw money in Japan :D they have lots of Tokyo locations, a few conveniently placed Osaka locations (including one at the airport lobby), and one in Kyoto. So I should be okay. :3 I only have to pay the exchange rate.

Finished Soul Eater. Mm... Excalibur was AMAZING, Death the Kid was great, as was Shinigami-sama, but other than that I can't say it was ... well... all that. I liked the first season the best. I guess my problem with it is that the plot of the last half (the parts without Medussa) was so-so, and while there were a lot of pretty entertaining characters, Maka was only so-so (and I think it always hurts a series when the main character is weak). :I But I was still happy to finish it. I just wanted more to happen with Excalibur. Kid's attack was cool. Black Star had a lot of potential but I think he could have been cooler (and according to Robert, he is in the manga), same with Soul. Stein was awesome in the beginning... but yeah. First half >> second half.

It's about time for me to swing into a manga phase. ^__^; I've been watching anime like mad but I really need to start catching up on series that are good in manga form.

But anyway, I'm starting Gundam 00 ... for Colleen's sake. ^^;

Anyone have any good Nintendo DS games I can borrow? :D

Or better yet... a DS lite I can borrow? ^^; I still haven't bought one. I'm not sure now if I should by a DS (currently $129) or wait and get a DSi (listed as $169.99 on wikipedia). I'm not really into the hand held systems but I want one for the trip, and I'm just not sure what's worth it for me. There's no reason to be cheap if the DSi is really amazingly better...

Appare!
It's.... in my head......

Hanafubuki KIRARI
iza yuke SAMURAI
Sono inochi wo mamoru tame

KIRIKIRI MAIMAI
saigo ni BANZAI
Kotoba no POWER bakuhatsutsuru

Retsu bushidou shoubushiyou
Samurai Sentai Shinkenger! Appare!

I want to cut my hair but if I do, I won't be able to make Marianne cosplay work. It'll still be long but maybe mid-back? Well, there are some particular styles I was looking at in a magazine, but for even the long hair it was shorter than mine. >.< I haven't really found the style I want yet though. But then ... cosplay problem. My other natural hair cosplay are fine, since it's all characters with braids and rough bangs (and my hair's actually a little too long for them anyway ^^; ...)... but Marianne's hair is perfect. ;__; It's so perfectly perfect I don't want to mess with it till at least after AX ... since probably Code Geass will dwindle down a lot after that. ^^;

In the mean time...

I've been doing 10 sit-ups in the morning and some jumping jacks :D this morning I did 50 (and it made me tired ^^;; ...) ... err... C.c was over from Friday till Sunday :D and we worked on cosplay. .... I'd like to say I made lots of progress, but I spend at least half of Saturday and the remaining time on Sunday working on this stupid pleated part (and doing a bad job of it ;__;) ... and I haven't even gotten to the dreaded yellow parts yet.

Currently watching My Boss My Hero XD It's hilarious! Macky<3 the plot is only so so but Macky is hilarious. I'm also watching Tenshi ni Narumon but kind of slowly. I finished Kino's Journey, it was really good.

tenshiyaki: gomen ne ;__; Time just flows differently when you're working... gomen. I'll make it work out, yakusokushimasu >.< I'll start calling and invade your apt when you least expect it. >D .....

Once again, I've managed to completely over book everything. OTL This Friday is another round (hopefully the second-to-last) of Tales of Vesparia.

I became nothing

Yet I still could not be everything.

The perfection I've been seeking for so long grows farther as I age, yet I know reversing time would bring me nothing.

The thing I seek comes from the past, but it is not in the past - it exists because the past was had.

Yet even though I believe that it is what I wish to grasp, that it is what I've been searching for all along, I know I cannot have it. I cannot be with it always; I can simply not find time for it, nor it for me.

If it cannot be with me, if I cannot have it, then it must not be what I am searching for. For what I seek is that which will complete me; that which will chase away the loneliness and make me regain the happiness that I once knew when I knew nothing. Perhaps this is impossible as ignorant bliss cannot be regained once lost - as knowledge learned cannot be willfully forgotten. But I believe, and I have for awhile...

That within knowledge is the spring of ignorant bliss... that while discovering everything, one comes to realize that there is indeed nothing... and that when that point is reached, one again becomes ignorant.

And thus, in the epitome of bliss.

Yet every moment I believe I have found it, that I have entered this state of nirvana, I again find myself shattered by my own inexperience, my body that's aged while my mind's stayed immature, by all that I lack and refuse to gain. I don't want to suffer, yet true learning comes from suffering. I run away, again and again, despite knowing that what I want is just behind me, that if only I made myself turn around, the blinding light so painful to my eyes would turn into whatever it is, whatever it is that I need, that I seek...

There is nothing. I know this, yet I can't bring myself to believe it.

If only I could let go.